Icyo Bibiliya ivuga ku buryo bwizewe bwo guhitamo uwo muzabana no kubaka imibanire ihamye iganisha ku rugo rwiza
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Icyo Bibiliya ivuga ku buryo bwizewe bwo guhitamo uwo muzabana no kubaka imibanire ihamye iganisha ku rugo rwiza

Guhitamo uwo muzabana si icyemezo cyoroshye cyangwa gishingira gusa ku marangamutima. Ni urugendo rusaba ubwenge, gusenga, no kuyoborwa n’ijambo ry’Imana.

Mu gihe isi igenda ishyira imbere amarangamutima n’inyungu z’ako kanya, Bibiliya yo igaragaza inzira ihamye, iganisha ku kubaka urugo rufite imizi ikomeye.

Uyu munsi AfriWed tugiye gukomoza ku nyigisho ireba ku mahame y’ingenzi Bibiliya itanga kugira ngo umusore n’inkumi bashobore guhitamo neza uwo bazabana no kubaka umubano uhamye, bityo bazagire urugo rwiza runogeye Imana.

Guhitamo uwo muzabana bisaba ubwenge, si amarangamutima gusa

Hari imvugo ikunze gukoreshwa ngo “urukundo ni impumyi,” ariko Bibiliya irabinyomoza. Ivuga ko “urukundo rutwikira ibyaha byinshi” (1 Petero 4:8), ariko ntivuga ko rutabona ibibi. Gukunda nyakuri si ukwibeshya ku kuri, ahubwo ni ukwemera ukuri no gufata icyemezo ubizi neza.

Mu Migani 14:15 hagira hati: “Umupfapfa yemera ijambo ryose, ariko umunyabwenge yitondera intambwe ze.” Ibi bisobanura ko umuntu uri mu rukundo agomba kwitonda, akiga uwo bakundana, akamenya imico ye, intege nke ze n’imbaraga ze.

Kurambagiza mu buryo bwiza bisaba gutega amatwi inama z’abandi, kwemera kunengwa, no gusesengura neza uwo wahisemo.

Kurambagiza neza bisaba kugisha inama

Bibiliya igaragaza kenshi ko kugisha inama ari isoko y’ubwenge. Mu Migani 11:14 havuga ko “aho inama ziri nyinshi ni ho hari agakiza.” Naho mu Migani 19:20 hagira hati: “Umva inama wemere no kwigishwa, kugira ngo uzabe umunyabwenge mu mperuka.”

Guhitamo uwo muzabana si urugendo rwo kwikorera wenyine. Umuryango, inshuti n’abakuze mu kwizera bafite uruhare rukomeye kuko bagufasha kubona ibyo utabona, bagufasha kwirinda amakosa, ndetse bagushyigikira mu byemezo.

Kwihererana urukundo bishobora gutuma umuntu afata imyanzuro idatekerejweho neza.

Kurambagiza bisaba buri ruhande kwitonda ntagutwarwa n’amarangamutima

Kwirinda kurambagiza mu bujiji

Umuntu uri mu rukundo agomba kwirinda kwirengagiza ukuri kubera amarangamutima. Hari igihe abantu banga kumva inama, bagafata uvuze ikibazo ku uwo bakunda nk’umwanzi.

Ariko Bibiliya Migani 12:15 igira iti: “Inzira y’umupfapfa imubereye myiza mu maso ye, ariko umunyabwenge yumvira inama.”

Kumenya uwo mukundana neza si ukumucira urubanza, ahubwo ni ukugira amahitamo ashingiye ku kuri. Urukundo ruzima rugendera ku kuri, si ku kwibeshya.

Usanga umuntu atifuza kumva umubwira intege nke z’uwo bakundana. Iyo hagize ugerageza kubimubwira yihutira kubihakana na mbere yo kubyumva. Ugasanga umukobwa cyangwa umusore yishyizemo ko uvuze ikibi ku uwo bakundana wese aba ashaka kubateranya.

Hari abo ababyeyi babwira usanga batemera kubatega amatwi. Ibyo nibyo twita kurambagiza mu bujiji. Umuntu uri kurambagiza akwiye kuba yiteguye gutega amatwi no gusesengura amakuru yose ajyanye n’uwo bakundana cyangwa imibanire yabo. Maze akamenya intege nke za mugenzi we, ku buryo amukunda azi neza uwo akunze uwo ari we, kandi akajya mu rukundo azi neza ibyo agiyemo ibyo ari byo n’ ikiguzi cyabyo.

Kwirinda kuyoborwa n’irari ry’ibintu

Muri iki gihe, hari abantu bafata urukundo nk’inzira yo kubona inyungu z’ubukungu. Bibiliya ibihanangiriza cyane. Imana yaremye umuntu imuha ubushobozi bwo gukora (Itangiriro 2:15), kandi akwiye kubukoresha. Umubano mwiza ushingira ku gufashanya, si ku gutwaza undi umutwaro.

Mu 2 Abatesalonike 3:10 handitswe ngo: “Umuntu wese wanga gukora ntakarye.” Ibi bitwigisha ko buri wese akwiye gukora no kwigira, urukundo rutagomba kuba inzira yo kubaho ku wundi ndetse ubunebwe bufatwa nk’imigirire idakwiriye.

Iyo rero uhisemo kudakora uba uhombeje abandi kandi uba ubaye igisonga kibi cy’iyo mpano y’ Imana. Icya kabiri ni uko hari agaciro Imana yagennye ko umuntu akura muri uko kuba hari icyo amariye abandi binyuze mu murimo akora.

Iyo rero uhisemo kudakora uba wiyambuye ako gaciro. Ugasanga aho kubera abandi igisubizo ahubwo uhindutse umutwaro bikaba byatuma uhitamo uwo muzabana udakwiriye kubera irari ry’ibintu.

Kwirinda ubusambanyi no kubaha umubiri

Kurambagiza si urwitwazo rwo kurenga ku ihame ry’uko iyo uryamanye n’uwo mutarashakana uba ukoze icyaha. Kwiyubaha no kubaha uwo mukundana ni byo bigaragaza urukundo nyarwo. Bibiliya ivuga kenshi ku busambanyi nk’icyaha gikomeye.

Inshuro nyinshi Bibiliya igaruka ku busambanyi nk’ icyaha kibi Imana yanga urunuka. Ubusambanyi ni imibonano mpuzabitsina ikozwe hagati y’ abantu babiri batari umugabo n’ umugore bashyingiranywe.

Pawulo agaruka kuri iki cyaha mu 1 Abakorinto 6:18 agaragaza impamvu abizera badakwiye gusambana agira  ati: “Muzibukire gusambana. Ibindi byaha byose umuntu akora bikorerwa inyuma y’ umubiri, ariko usambana aba akoze icyaha cyo mu mubiri we. Mbese ntimuzi yuko imibiri yanyu ari insengero z’ Umwuka Wera uri muri mwe, uwo mufite wavuye ku Mana? Kandi ntimuri abanyu ngo mwigenge kuko mwaguzwe igiciro. Nuko rero mutume imibiri yanyu ihimbaza Imana.”

Muri iki gihe, iyo ubwiye abari kurambagiza kwirinda ubusambanyi usanga bihutira kubaza ngo ese mu bijyanye n’ imibonano mpuzabitsina ni ibiki byemewe hagati y’ umusore n’ umukobwa bari kurambagizanya?

Pawulo abigarukaho mu 1 Abatesalonike 4:3-4 agira ati: “Icyo Imana ishaka ni iki: ukwezwa kwanyu no kwirinda gusambana, ngo umuntu wese areke kurengera cyangwa kuriganya mwene Se kuri ibyo, kuko Umwami wacu ahora inzigo y’ ibyo byose nk’ uko twabanje kubabwira  no kubahamiriza.”

Iyo urambagiza bisaba gusa kureba ibyo utakwifuza ko umugore wawe (cyangwa umugabo wawe niba uri umugore) yakorana n’ undi muntu. Ibyo utifuza ko uwawe yakorana n’ undi muntu, nawe ntiwemerewe kubikorana n’umuntu wese mutashyingiranywe.

Gushisoza bizatuma ugira urugo rwiza

Bibiliya itwereka ko kubaka urugo rwiza bitangirira mu kurambagiza neza. Bisaba kwirinda icyaha, kugisha inama, gukoresha ubwenge no gushyira Imana imbere mu byemezo byose.

Nk’uko Zaburi 127:1 ibivuga, iyo Uwiteka atakubakiye inzu, abayubaka baba baruhira ubusa. Iyo umuntu akurikije amahame y’Imana mu rukundo, aba ashyizeho umusingi ukomeye uzamufasha kubaka urugo rwiza, ruhamye kandi rurambye.

Iyo urukundo rushingiye ku Mana, ku kuri, mu bushishozi no ku mahame yayo, ruba urufatiro rukomeye rw’urugo rwiza, ruhamye kandi rurambye.

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